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Originally posted on 01/03/18

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#BreadGate has reached crisis point across the country with most stores saying they have naan. Everyone is being advised to baguette ready for empty shelves and the butter cold which is sweeping across Ireland.

Severe attacks by The Beast from The Yeast have been reported in the East of the country, while the impact in the West is being described as crumby. Despite this, everyone is still being warned doughnut venture out.

All breadwinners should be home by 4 pm with employers encouraging workers to use this time effectively; some suggesting they use it to bun and loaf around or oven work through their personalised Netflix list. People are also being reminded not to focaccia to look after their pets and keep them out of the crispy weather.

Meanwhile, bakers across the nation say #BreadGate is a multi-grain issue and are asking for patience from the public. Local baker Mr. Bagel Brown had this to say: “Our shop has been jam packed this week. We were on a roll but now, people are sourdough. The empty shelves are making many of them just break down and rhye. Wheat actually loaf to be able to supply everyone but crust us when we say we are doing everything we can.”

*Credit to whoever created this spectacular meme and yes, I’m a shameless lover of puns.